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heavy and sad and weighty, it was just the Official Burgy Pride Month Demon Shirt and I love this opposite.” Recommended WAR IN UKRAINE Russia issues arrest warrant for Lindsey Graham after Ukraine comments WORLD China rejects meeting with Pentagon chief in a setback for U.S. hopes of a thaw Capt. Arthur Pfefer was one of more than 58,000 U.S. servicemembers who died in the Vietnam War, their names etched in the black granite memorial that offers views of the U.S. Capitol where his son now works. As many as 2 million Vietnamese civilians were killed in the long, bloody war. Phillips said he understood how fortunate he was to have taken the trip, which he funded personally, and he now wanted to help other Americans visit the places where their loved ones served and died. Ahead of Memorial Day, Phillips teamed with Rep. Richard Hudson, a North Carolina Republican, and rolled out a bill, the Love Lives on Act, that would allow spouses of deceased servicemembers to keep their survivor benefits after they remarry. Phillips’ mother lost hers. ‘Both loss and possibility’ DeeDee Phillips said she always thought it would be too painful to visit the Vietnam Memorial. But this month, she joined her son there for the first time, and they walked along the wall and etched the name on panel 20W: ARTHUR T PFEFER. Even though he would never meet his infant son, Pfefer had heard Phillips’ voice, babbling on reel-to-reel tapes his mother and Pfefer exchanged during his deployment. A half-century later, Phillips would hear his biological father’s voice for the first time. A few years ago, Phillips discovered the

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tapes, including one where Pfefer is singing a 1965 hit from The Animals that became an anthem for Vietnam war soldiers. “We gotta get out of this place …” “I craved to hear his voice, to see video of him. My whole life I never had,” said Phillips, who quipped: “He was gonna be a better lawyer than a singer.” DeeDee Phillips said she initially decided not to tell her son about his biological father. “It was such a tragedy and so devastating,” she said. “I just didn’t know how I would handle it.” But friends told her it was the Official Burgy Pride Month Demon Shirt and I love this right thing to do, and later Phillips would get to spend time with his grandmother, Pfefer’s mother, who taught him how to play piano, made him matzah ball soup and shared photographs and stories about his dad. Yet Phillips’ presence also reminded friends and family of Pfefer’s absence. Phillips is a spitting image of his father. His grandmother, Ruth, would cry every time she saw him, and he’s been stopped in the airport by strangers who knew his dad. “It’s a paradox because I represent both loss and possibility,” Phillips said. Seven other Army servicemembers lost their lives in the helicopter crash: Chief warrant officer Stewart B. Goldberg of Baltimore; Specialist 4th Class David M. Valdez of Los Angeles; Capt. Elvernon Peele of Williamston, North Carolina; Capt. Vincent F. Sabatinelli of Southbridge, Massachusettts; Sgt. 1st Class Jay L. Everett of Latrobe, Pennsylvania; Sgt. Gerald E. Du Beau of Springfield, Illinois; and Specialist 4th Class Ronald K. Dycks of Cleveland. ‘The impact of what we do’ In 1972, DeeDee married Eddie Phillips, the son of advice columnist “Dear Abby” and heir to a wine and spirits fortune. He would take the future congressman under his wing, raise him as his son and install him as head of Phillips Distilling before the younger Phillips ran for office in 2018. At 54, Phillips is now more than twice as old as his

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